well I have survived another Friday and Saturday night! Hubby and I took the kiddos to the movies last night, Ready Player One, it was actually surprisingly good! We went to the early show so we were back home shortly after 9, watched the hockey game and did some reading. Stayed up later than I have been lately but still feel great this morning! 🙂
My yoga hasn’t been going very well, I’m having a hard time dragging my ass out of bed at 5:30am and I shouldn’t be, I’m asleep between 9:30-10:00pm every night and actually sleeping pretty well. Walking isn’t going too badly, I’m aiming for 3x week and getting that in for the most part. I’m down 3.2 lbs since giving up alcohol and I’m hoping to just keep losing it slowly but steadily. Hopefully once I lose another 10lbs or so I can start running again. Just trying to ease my way back in to the physical stuff since my knees are feeling the effect of the extra weight I have been carrying in and I need them to work lol.
I found myself a little grouchy last weekend, I was pretty snappy with the OH and we ended up arguing two nights in a row which makes me soooooo friggin anxious. Frig I hate confrontation, always have! I know that comes from my childhood and I also know its something I need to work on. I tend to not say when something is bothering me because I don’t want to upset anyone or cause and argument, the problem with that though is that it builds and builds and builds and then I blow! Everything all comes out at once because I get to the point where I can’t hold it in anymore, its not healthy for me or my relationships. That’s definitely going to be something I need to figure out once I get my footing a little more in this sobriety thing again!
So far I’m still not finding it difficult to stay away from wine, didn’t even really think about it last night to be honest. Its all the damn feelings that I have a problem with. Had a major blow dealt this week in the debt department, specifically taxes… I got through it though, didn’t freak too badly, although I still haven’t come up with a concrete plan of what to do about it, working on it though! If you are reading this and happen to be Canadian (or from almost anywhere actually), you have likely been following the news just as I have about the hockey team from Saskatchewan who were involved in that horrible accident… I literally cried myself to sleep last night after watching some coverage on the 11pm news. I had seen multiple articles on it yesterday on fb was deliberately trying to avoid it because I knew I wouldn’t handle it well. I just can not wrap my head around it, I am sure we all feel the same on that. My heart is breaking for the families, surviving teammates, their families, the community, everyone… I just can’t even imagine the pain… You think you have huge problems and then you hear something like that and quickly realize how much worse things could be, how in one instant life can be taken away from us, how in one instant those who we love can be taken away from us. My heart and prayers go out to them all, God speed.